On Seeking Forgiveness and Being Undeserving Of It

It's funny how people didn't care that their vote would increase the cost of or outright eliminate healthcare options, terrorize communities with masked bootleg police and the U.S. military, devastate the job market, increase the cost of living, and dismantle and eliminate food assistance programs and other social services for millions of people because they somehow thought that Black folx, Brown folx, Indigenous folx, trans folx, and immigrants would be the only people harmed...until they found themselves also being hurt because, you know, all of the things mentioned above impact everyone and not just a couple of communities voters felt were expendable and disposable.

It's also funny how these same voters begged and pleaded like Keith Sweat for their president to save them for months on end, only to realize late last month that they would not be saved because their president had essentially used them to increase his wealth and power.

Hilarious.

Now, suddenly, it's y'all begging forgiveness on TikTok and Instagram for "mistakenly" voting for y'all's president (some of y'all in the last three presidential elections) and putting us in this autocracy.

Now it’s, "I made a mistake" and "We have to stick together."

Y'all can miss me with all of that.

I can care about you as a person, even if you don't care about me and mine, because I don't want to see anyone hurting and struggling. I'm a humanist and an empathic being. Even if you hate me, I want you to be okay. But let's keep it 100: you did not make a mistake. You knew what you were doing. All of you did. So nah, we are not "sticking together." I do not forgive, and I definitely will not forget.

Y'all need to learn that empathy only goes so far.

I do not have it in me to forgive you for willingly hoping others would suffer so you could thrive under a hateful regime. And I know I'm not the only one feeling this way.

Y'all expect people you harm to forgive you because you live in a country where white supremacy has trained y'all to abuse others and expect forgiveness. It ain't happenin' this time, and a bunch of y'all are starting to see this, and you're unraveling. A part of me feels sorry for you, for your despair. But it's a small part, because y'all have made it very clear that this was supposed to be your "survival of the fittest" moment and you're realizing that a whole bunch of y'all ain't the fittest. And knowing that probably sucks. But...well...

I hope that you survive what you've inflicted on all of us, because that's what I want for everyone. And most of y'all will survive because of the work and community programs created and led by the people you were hoping would be harmed by all of this. But that's all that you'll get from me, and all you should get from them. That's more than enough. And if you have a problem with hearing that?

Better go and embrace some of that greatness you voted for to keep you fed and wealthy while "liberals" decide whether to help y'all at all.

On Transphobia, Facts, and Acting Like We Don't Know Who The Real Terrorists Are

TW: transphobia, hate.

The Heritage Foundation is urging the FBI to add “Transgender Ideology-Inspired Violent Extremism” (TIVE) to its list of domestic extremist groups so that it could “detect, disrupt, & dismantle TIVE cells.”

Citing the murder of Charlie Kirk as the “latest example in a long line of home-grown terrorists brainwashed by trans ideology,” it’s being reported that the FBI is discussing “treating Trans Individuals as a subset of its new threat category - Nihilistic Violent Extremists” or NVEs (a category created earlier this year). What’s an NVE, you ask?

The Federal Bureau of Investigation defines “Nihilistic Violent Extremism” as “criminal conduct… in furtherance of political, social, or religious goals that derive primarily from a hatred of society at large and a desire to bring about its collapse by sowing indiscriminate chaos.” There is, of course, not one bit of evidence that suggests trans folx are fomenting terrorism, but facts and evidence don’t matter in a budding autocracy, right?

Wrong.

Fact - y’all’s president and his cronies, with guidance from a white supremacist terrorist group masquerading as a think tank, are planning to define 1% of the U.S. population as domestic terrorists in a country where cishet males of pallor are literally terrorizing people every day.

Fact - less than 1% of mass shooters in U.S. history identified as trans. Cis males are 98% of mass shooters in U.S. history. Cishet males of pallor make up 54% of the recorded mass shooters in U.S. history.

Fact - the FBI currently has 11 known and registered white supremacist terrorist sects that they are supposed to be monitoring the activities of. I’ll let you guess the racial and gender identities of 96% of their members.

Fact - 1% of the population can’t be a terrorist group. That’s not anywhere near the population number and demographic structure it would need to be for a legitimate FBI to consider a subset of the citizenry a legitimate threat, a recorded terroristic threat, or a group that should warrant attention.

Fact - this sh-- they’re trying to pull is intentional, targeted, and violent transphobia and hatred. Pure and simple.

Contrary to popular belief, facts still matter. Facts aren’t dead.

But the way we use those facts to mobilize, stand with, and protect people and communities being targeted by hate could be, though.

It's well past time for folx to decide to stand up and fight the way we should in the face of transphobia, bigotry, and hatred or decide the facts make them too uncomfortable to care about their fellow human beings in danger.

On Charlie

So...Charlie Kirk was shot this afternoon while in Utah on one of his college campus indoctrination of young adults tours. He was shot while in the middle of talking about how trans mass shooters are one of the largest dangers to our society when the truth is cishet men of pallor are overwhelmingly the largest demographic of mass shooters and domestic terrorists in the United States.

All reports state that he didn't make it.

In other news, I'm making okra and tomatoes, cornbread, and fish for dinner. So...I'm really looking forward to that.

Now, before some of y'all call me out for being callous, let me just stop you right there because you'll be wasting your time and energy.

Charlie Kirk was a deplorable human being. His legacy will be that of a deplorable human being who added nothing to society other than pain and oppression by elevating hate in every space he could present it in.

You get from the universe what you put into it.

That includes violence, hate, and harm.

I shed no tears for horrible people who believe me or anyone else shouldn't exist or should be oppressed. I have no thoughts and prayers for them. Yeah, it sucks that we live in a country where anyone can be shot at any given time, regardless of whether I condone their beliefs or not. Thousands of innocent lives have been lost because the U.S. cares more about the right to own a gun and do with it what you will than the lives of its citizenry. But people like Charlie Kirk literally advocated for opposing gun laws that could save lives. There's footage of him saying that he thought not having gun laws was worthwhile, even if it meant we "had a few gun deaths each year," because sensible gun laws would infringe on [white] people's "rights."

Ironic, and not in that Alanis Morrisette way.

You get from the universe what you put into it.

Regardless of how they view my existence or the existence of others without their privilege, power, and positionality, I don't want anyone to die at the hands of gun violence, or any kind of violence for that matter. But again, you get from the universe what you put into it.

And let's be real here: it'll be those who have no power who will catch the most harm from Charlie Kirk's death. The powers-that-be will be extra harsh toward "liberals" - not "liberals" of pallor, mind you, but those who fit the "DEI agenda" - in the aftermath of all of this. We'll all learn nothing from it and Charlie's hateful legacy will be viewed through rose-colored glasses. I'm already seeing news outlets gloss over how hateful and harmful he was, with pundits calling him a "godly man," "enormously courageous," "unapologetic about his views," and someone who "cared deeply about informing young voters."

So...yeah.

I'm making okra and tomatoes, cornbread, and fish for dinner.

I hope your dinner is equally as delicious as mine will be. Sending that energy your way...

...because you get from the universe what you put into it.

On Conversations with the Brainwashed Bigoted Masses

So...y'all's president has unveiled the next stage of the plan to make the United States a Christian, racist, homophobic, transphobic, xenophobic, ableist, autocratic hellscape that criminalizes poverty while increasing said poverty tenfold and making homelessness illegal by declaring a state of emergency in the nation's capital and unleashing the National Guard on a citizenry and city that has seen a dramatic decrease in violent crime and crime in general. And he's doing this with no evidence of any kind of crime escalation that would deem this move necessary, because the United States Supreme Court has ensured that being President has no checks and balances, allowing y'all's president to do what he wants to all of us with no repercussions.

Yet some of y'all are still supporting this man and these decisions because, for some reason, you think he's not launching a pilot program for a nationwide police state where everyone faces a state of constant danger for just existing. Hell, some of y'all have already been increasingly harmed by the decisions y'all's president has made and the impacts they have had on entire communities across the country, including rural communities. Some of y'all have lost jobs, businesses, farms, family members, healthcare options, and basic human rights in the past seven months due to the kazillion hateful executive orders and bills passed by y'all's president and his cronies. Yet some of y'all are still supporting this man and his decisions. Some of y'all have gone as far as to say things like, "I know he didn't mean to hurt me. I know he'll make things better" while he continues making things worse for you. And some of y'all are still out here talkin' about we need to keep the lines of communication open with folx and take care of folx who voted for and support this ongoing harm while being harmed themselves and believing they aren't intentionally being harmed.

With all of this in mind, my question is simple: what conversation is there left for us to have?

I refuse to continue putting energy into fruitless conversations with people brainwashed by their own hatred and bigotry.

I refuse to consort with FAFO people who force us all to find out, even those of us who weren't effin' around and knew what effin' around would do to all of us.

I'm done trying to help people "see the light" when they'd prefer to look directly into the sun and act like their corneas aren't being fried.

It's not worth it, y'all. There's no benefit to continuing a directionless discourse with the folx who are embracing their dictator because they're never going to hear you or believe the facts you present that show them how in danger they truly are.

Reserve your energy for fighting for those who need your help. It's clear who and what we need to fight for - and it ain't a fanbase for a wannabe dictator who are cool with a dictator oppressing us all while believing they'll eventually be deemed special and spared of his wrath.

Day 5

I've lived in my house since 2012. I have lived around the same neighbors, give or take a few, since 2012. There's a woman of pallor whose house I've walked by at least 100 times in the twelve years I've lived in my neighborhood, whether on the way to doing something or just taking a stroll. This woman of pallor has seen me at least fifty times in those twelve years and has never spoken a word to me. Today, while pulling my garbage and recycling cans from the curb and into my backyard, this woman of pallor talked to me for the first time.

And she questioned me as if she was planning to call ICE to knock on my door.

This woman asked me my name, my MIDDLE NAME, if I owned my home or had children.

This woman has never said two words to me in twelve years.

She asked me all these questions and then tried to frame it with, "Well, you can never be certain. It's dangerous out here, so it's good to know who's in your neighborhood. With all this 'woke' stuff? You just never know. It wasn't like that in my day." She also tried to invoke her religious convictions, giving me her information and stating that God would not let her ask all these questions without introducing herself.

I guess Elizabeth Ann wanted me to know the name of the person likely to call ICE on me so I know who to thank when they show up at my door.

It's day five of what 60% of cis males of pallor and 53% of cis women of pallor voted for.

Five f'n days.

Five. Of 1,460.

Thanks, people of pallor. I'm feeling great. I've watched people I know and care about sit in fear with millions of other citizens over the past five days; as the world unravels around them, their rights and privileges begin to disappear, and the current administration does everything it can to deport them or threaten their existence. And now I get the added icing on the cake of being extra vigilant about having three forms of identification on my person whenever I leave my home while being prepared to defend people being harmed by hateful people and ICE agents.

Are we great again yet? Let me know when we're great again so I can circle the day on my calendar.