Monday's Opening Thought: March 28, 2022
This week’s opening thought: I had my first meeting of the day at 10:00 am this morning. It was with a white cis female consultant. The meeting started with her trying to “school” me and “teach” me after I shared that the way I do my work isn’t a fit for many companies. She told me if I were more respectable and worked harder to make relationships with white people who found me scary, uncomfortable, or labeled me as dangerous, more comfortable, and safe for white people, my work would be easier.
Needless to say, that meeting ended early.
I couldn’t even make it to 11:00 am, y’all, without having fun with micro-aggressions live via satellite from my TV room. It made that Law and Order marathon I had playing in the background on mute hit different.
When white professionals disrespect us, say they’re scared of us, or label us as dangerous or uncooperative when we aren’t the palatable person of color they think we should be? The response isn’t for us to homogenize ourselves for whiteness. We need white professionals to quit pushing for Black folx, Black women, people of color to “be respectful” as a solution to the racism we face. Your “advice” isn’t helpful. Your “advice” doesn’t stop our jobs from being on the line if we don’t take your “advice” and implement it “just right” (note: there is no such thing as “just right” – that’s just the way y’all act when giving “advice”). We need less “advice” and more stepping up, speaking up, and speaking out when your white colleagues come at us with their micro-aggressions. We need white professionals to call in or call out their white colleagues instead of co-signing or being silent when the fear-mongering and characterizations begin.
We need y’all not to take your own advice.
I’ll leave y’all to sit with that, the way the white cis female consultant I met with this morning left me sitting in the Zoom meeting when she got livid about me calling her out for her actions and abruptly exited stage left.