Monday's Opening Thought: May 23, 2022

Image description: Black pro wrestling legend Booker T watching white pro wrestling legends Hulk Hogan and Ric Flair hugging and having a great time at a wrestling event. Booker T has a disgusted look on his face. Ric Flair and Hulk Hogan hugging is captioned with the words “White people wishing each other a happy Juneteenth while harming Black people every day.” Booker T is captioned with the word “Me.”

This week's opening thought: When Juneteenth became a federal bank holiday in 2021, there were many Black folx who were happy. Many Black people feel that making Juneteenth a national bank holiday was a step in the right direction from a race relations perspective. They felt that by acknowledging the Black experience in this way that more U.S. Americans, more white U.S. Americans, would recognize how hard Black people in the United States have fought to get to this place in time.

No tea, no shade, but y'all should've known better than that. We're talking about white U.S. Americans here.

Making Juneteenth a federal holiday was never about learning, reflection, or supporting Black communities for white people. Juneteenth is a bank holiday because the white people who make decisions in this country wanted to feel good about themselves after the murder of George Floyd. Juneteenth, in their eyes, was the low-hanging fruit they needed to "make it right." So they swiftly signed it into law.

And in doing so, they swiftly opened the door for white people to make more money off of Black bodies while continuing the disrespect of Black people in the United States.

Here we are, in the year of somebody's lord, 2022, and Walmart is flush with Juneteenth party decorations, party favors, bingo cards, and "special edition" ice cream flavors. None of these items are made by Black people, of course. White people have put together whites-only Juneteenth parties at swank venues and country clubs and have gotten angry when called out about it. Major publications have been writing how-to guides for white people for two years now, instructing white folx how they should celebrate Juneteenth. These articles are tone-deaf and white-centered, but no one reading this should be surprised. They map out how white people can be performative allies and pat themselves on the back for Juneteenth. White companies are having Juneteenth parties in the workplace. The same companies that complain about "not being enough qualified Black candidates" are subjecting the 10 Black employees on their payroll to a "party" space with their white co-workers. If you're Black, you find yourself in a "party space" with the same white co-workers who hand out microaggressions like Juneteenth party favors every day "celebrating" the enslavement of your ancestors with red velvet cake and a Black speaker hired to "teach" about Black lives.

Real talk?

Juneteenth ain't for you, white people. It's not for you. It's not for you to enjoy. It's not for you to make a profit. Stop it.

Your people have profited from Black bodies for long enough. You don't need another opportunity to do so.

Only white people are callous enough to celebrate lying to Black bodies about the end of their forced enslavement after enslaving them, sexually assaulting them, and traumatizing them for 400+ years. Only white people are callous enough to make money off of the enslavement of Black people at the hands of white people hundreds of years after kidnapping and enslaving Black people.

Y'all really out here making your enslavement of Black bodies a federal day off for white people? Are y'all really making ice cream and party décor and t-shirts to sell to Black people and other white people with none of the funds going to Black communities? Y'all are seriously about two years away from Juneteenth sales at furniture stores, and it's harmful and tasteless.

SIGH.

I'm not going to give you tips or advice about how you should "celebrate" Juneteenth, white people. I'm not going to provide you with book or documentary recommendations. Nah, nix that. I've got one tip for you.

Just don't.

It ain't your emancipation.

You don't get to "celebrate" Black enslavement while calling the police on your Black neighbor or teaching your children "not to see color." You don't get to "celebrate" Black enslavement while treating Black women in the workplace like Juneteenth party favors: fun for a few moments but easily discarded and disregarded.

Juneteenth ain't for you. It ain't your emancipation.

Just leave Black people alone on June 19, white people. Let us celebrate in our way while we continue healing from the ongoing trauma you create.

God, I just had an image of a special edition Juneteenth strawberry Kool-Aid pop into my head.

If y'all do that, I'm leaving the country.

Monday's Opening Thought: May 9, 2022

This week’s opening thought: Please take moments to disconnect from the weight of the world around us and focus on your mental, physical, and emotional health and joy.

I know the world is scary and dangerous. It’s easy for the things happening around us to permeate every part of our lives. Many of us are in a seemingly never-ending fight for our rights and autonomy against hateful people wielding what they call their religious convictions to harm. For many of us, our lives and our loved ones are at the whim of politicians and hate groups with no consequences or checks and balances for those causing harm. Depression and anxiety are real, and it is understandable if you’re struggling to stay afloat as the world burns. But you deserve to have time where you can disconnect and center on the things and people that bring you joy and energy. Don’t tether every waking moment of your day to news feeds. Yes, we need to fight and keep fighting, but you aren’t going to be fighting anything but health concerns if you don’t stop, breathe, and take care of yourself and your people.

Embrace joy.

Embrace you.

Embrace getting the support you need to center your mental, physical, and emotional health.

Sadly, this sh—we’re facing isn’t going anywhere. There’s a whole lot of fight ahead. I want you to be here so we can win these fights together.

Your people and those you fight for love you and want you to be here.

It's OK to take an afternoon, a morning, a day off. You deserve it. We all do.

Monday's Opening Thought: May 2, 2022

Image description: An image from "The Bachelor." A white man, facing away from the viewer while wearing a Black suit, is handing a rose to a white woman in a black and white-striped evening gown.

This week's opening thought: There's a swath of white adult "professionals" out here dealing with the consequences of their hateful actions, many for the first time. They decided to go online and harass Black women, Brown women, and queer folx and found themselves unemployed after those they attacked sent their employer the screenshots. Some have been bullying and harming people in their workplaces for years and are finally being held accountable for their actions and are currently one step away from being unemployed. Some are being recorded saying and doing harmful things in public places and finding out that the companies they work for don’t want to be associated with their toxicity, leaving them to apply for unemployment. I don’t wish unemployment on anyone.

But it couldn’t happen to a nicer set of folx.

That lack of accountability for their actions that permeates whiteness hits hard when their chickens finally come home to roost, and they have to pay the price. We’re seeing more and more white “professionals” having to pay up, and their world is legitimately rocked. We’re seeing their victimhood come to the surface, their unwillingness to digest that if you harm others, you have to take responsibility for that harm and the consequences that come with it. It’s wild to watch. It’s something I never thought I’d see in my lifetime, and I am here for it. Don't want to lose your job for harassing and harming Black women and people of color? Then don't harass and harm Black women and people of color. Not "don't get caught," like the "good old days," but don’t start at all because it's so easy to gather the receipts and return your ass to the store for a refund.

Legitimate accountability and the consequences of their actions are shaking white “professionals” to their core. Of course, they think they are victims of all of this as they lose their jobs and fracture their networks because people don’t want to be associated with them. That’s what generations of no accountability and no consequences will do to you. I can't imagine how insulating and infantilizing never having to take responsibility for your actions can be and how invincible it makes many white people feel. They can't stomach losing their cloak of invincibility, y’all, and it’s guilty pleasure-level, popcorn-worthy viewing. And I don't even feel guilty about watching it.

Is this how watching “The Bachelor” feels?

Monday's Opening Thought: April 25, 2022

This week’s opening thought: If you’re a recruiter, HR “professional” in charge of recruiting efforts for an organization, hiring manager, or hiring committee member in 2022, and you’re still asking the following questions (or some version of these questions):

“Tell me about yourself.”

“What would you say are your strengths?”

“What would you say is your biggest weakness?”

“Where do you see yourself in five years?”

“Have you ever been fired?”

“What was the worst trait of your previous manager?”

“What did you like least about your last job?”

“Why do you want this job?”

“How does your experience relate to this job?”

‍“I’m interviewing other candidates for this role. Why should I hire you?"

“Where do you live?”

“What year did you graduate?”

“Describe yourself in three words.”

“Describe yourself in one sentence.”

“What country are you from?”

“What is your race?”

“What is your current salary?”

“Have you been convicted of a crime?”

“Have you ever been arrested?”

“Do you have a disability?”

“Are you married?”

“Do you have kids you have to drop off and pick up from school every day?”

“Are you a religious person?”

“Are there any religious holidays you observe?”

“Are you pregnant?”

“Are you planning on starting a family anytime soon?”

“Do you have kids? How many?”

“What are your child care arrangements?”

You shouldn’t feel the need to question why you’re losing awesome candidates to other companies. You shouldn’t feel the need to wonder why candidates keep removing themselves from the running halfway through your recruiting process. You shouldn’t feel the need to wonder why Global Majority folx, people of color, and folx from marginalized communities are leaving your company.

All of the answers you seek are in the questions you ask.

P.S.: Before you ask, yes, people are still asking these questions in interviews. I had an interview last week, and the recruiter asked me three of these questions - and he only asked me five questions. I'll let y'all guess which three. People regularly tell me about the questions they get asked in interviews, and this list only scratches the surface.

Monday's Opening Thought: April 18, 2022

This week’s opening thought, for Global Majority folx, people of color, and people of culture: know your worth and hold to it, not just your financial worth but your worth as a human being.

Don’t let these white supremacist and colonizer-based systems and organizations we must grapple with to survive decide what they think your worth is because they will always offer you pennies instead of diamonds. Don’t accept anyone underpaying you or undervaluing what you bring to their company. You are much more than a diversity hire. Your lived experience and work experience are more valuable than they want to admit. They need you more than you need them or the added stress of their urgency to position you as the magic solution to their issues.

Yesterday’s price is not today’s price.

And today’s price might go up this afternoon if people keep trippin’.