This Week's Opening Thought: August 15, 2022

This week’s opening thought: I don’t know who needs to hear this, but it is more than OK to just go to work, do your job, and go home. Don’t let white supremacist patriarchal workplace culture tell you otherwise.

You don’t need “family.” You’ve got family at home. Work ain’t the Olive Garden unless you work at the Olive Garden. And even then? When you’re there, you ain’t family. It’s a job, yo.

You don’t need to participate in workplace gossip and be privy to John in Accounting not liking Cheryl from the Development team. That sh—ain’t got nothing to do with you, and contrary to popular belief, knowing all the goings-on in the office doesn’t build team chemistry or camaraderie. It creates animosity and a lack of trust and faith in others.

You don’t need to attend every after-work extracurricular activity, like the happy hours, company picnics, and holiday “celebrations.” I can tell you from experience that going to those things won’t give you an extra step up over someone for a promotion or pay raise, especially if you’re Black, Brown, or Indigenous. I can also tell you from experience that hanging out with work acquaintances while they drink and say and do the same ignorant things they do at work is not fun. And besides, they ain’t paying you.

Some of y’all probably read the above and thought, “That’s pretty antisocial Pharoah.” Is it, though? I’m not saying not to build working relationships that allow you to complete your workload in a cohesive and timely manner. I’m not saying you shouldn’t care about the people you work with 40 hours a week. I’m saying that the “social norms” of white supremacist patriarchal workplace culture isn’t being sociable – it’s a culture of enmeshment that causes short and long-term harm. What most workplaces consider a “family culture” is, in actuality, a busted rickety toxic family system that has only ever worked for a select few.

White supremacist workplace cultures breed a particular “we’re a team of soloists” mentality that echoes the collective heteronormative society. Most workplace cultures thrive on divisiveness and pettiness. They thrive on belittlement and scapegoating. Their lifeblood is using others to get ahead and supporting a lack of empathy and care from the top down. And real talk?

Nobody needs to spend more time in those environments than they already do.

It is OK to go to work, do your job, and go home. The people at your job are not your “family.”

You’ve got family at home, whether “conventional” or chosen.

Your allegiance is to you and yours, first and foremost. Your allegiance is not to the toxic environment that pays your bills. Your allegiance is to your joy, happiness, and harnessing the energy you want to have to be present in your life outside work.

Clock out on time and throw up dem deuces on the way out the door.